Monday, December 31, 2012

Smile Dance Be

It wasn't hard to choose my next three words for my year, considering I'd already started practicing their ideaology this past month.

Smile

As I previously mentioned in a post, Doc recommended I try to smile more. Smiling has never really been a problem for me, but I like the idea of doing it intentionally.

I want to stop and smile when I see something that amuses me, when I notice something amusing about my life.

I want to use my smile to take moments to enjoy my life. To live in the now. To soak in the awesome that is my every day. To highlight the amazing when it happens. To find joy. To deal with sorrow.

I will smile.

Dance

I work. I write. I run, occasionally. And I do yoga a little less than I run.

I have family. I have friends. I do things... a lot of things.

This past year has been hectic, with my at times packed schedule and crammed in work and trying to see everyone I care about, and and and...

Sometimes it felt like I was juggling on the edge of a cliff. Sometimes it felt like I was plugging the holes of a dyke with each of my fingers, toes, knees, and nose. Sometimes I laughed. Sometimes I cried.

My life was, and is, anything but simple.

Still, I want to dare myself to dance instead of struggle. Dance, instead of worry. Dance, instead of fret or fear.

Know that love is more important than I let it be. Know that the people in my life deserve more of me. Know that my passions are necessary, not secondary.

I will dance.

Be

Too often I expect myself to be someone or something that I am not. Too often I set up impossible expectations for myself. I don't just let myself be.

So goal number three: just be.

Allow myself to be sad or upset, instead of holding it all in. Allow myself to be honest instead of lying about my emotions. Allow myself to be a person, not atop a pedestal doomed to fall flat at the slightest touch, but down on this earth and grounded in truth and love.

I am me, left, right or center of whatever perfect is.

I will just be me.

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