For Me

~ a dark thought ~

"I'm not answering your questions. Your questions are juvenile, amateur, rude. No, I will not answer your questions."

"Fine, then can you just tell me why. Why did you do it? Why? And to so many..."

"Now, that is a question I will answer. It was... the sounds.

"For me, well, I'm a very auditory person.  Low, reverberating sounds, bass, deep, bone rattling sounds are so very pleasing to me.  High pitch noises, nails on chalkboard, what have you, they hurt me, actually physically causing me pain.  But, there is... one exception to my odd auditory affliction.

"There is something about their screams, their wails and their moans. There is just something about the sounds they make.

"For me, the rest was just a means to an end. The blood, the blades, the mess...all just what it took to get them to make those sounds. Those beautiful, wondrous sounds.

"My favorites were when, when they still had fight in them, when they thought they would live, could live, through my ordeal, they would let out deep low guttural screams from the base of their stomachs busting out through their throats, propelled by every last molecule of air in their lungs. For me, that was the best part.

"Oh, that didn't stop me. No, no. Much like the first bite of dessert, when you know no other bite will taste as good, yet you keep eating, that was what it was like. Tasting the sounds of the screams, their moans, their pleas. Whimpers, whines, wails. Oh, the cacophony of it all still lives in my head. I had no need to record them. I remember every last syllable, every last note of them.

"For me, Sir, it had nothing to do with death, or gore, or brutality, though it took those things for me to get what I wanted, what I needed. For me, the sounds, the supple songs of their cries bursting forth, and my ears enveloping every moment of it. That was all I ever wanted, ever needed, and ever will need.

"So, Sir, do with me as you must. I'm resigned to whatever fate awaits me. Because, for me, I have a library of lyrics to play back each and every day. And no punishment you could lay down will ever be so great as to spoil the music ever playing in my ears."